The boys of summer

Lucidity is floating in and out right now due to the double shot of vicoden that's coursing through my pizza filled arteries. I was under the knife this morning getting 3 teeth extracted. The surgeon required that someone had to be present with me so that I could get home safely. Apparently Jignesh the cab driver wasn't enough...
So I had to call Lori to come with me since she is off for the summer. I made the mistake of going on a 4 bar bender last nite with the schmoilito. From Tom Collins to Jack and Jameson,it a dude fest on the bar front. Schmoilito offered some good advice. He said "Fob, tonite you have a girlfriend. Now go out there and talk to some girls." the first place I was afforded the privilege of engaging a young pretty thing in conversation was at the venerable "bahama Mama's". I rolled up on cute Indian shorty and slurred out some cheddar-laden line about drinks and buying and caste system. MY attempts were arrested with a polite no thank you after which I breathed a sigh of relief since I had a girlfriend at home. Do I? Shit! No! Damn you schmoiL! Feeling worse than ever I hit a few more places, not caring that I was supposed to fast for tomorrow's surgery after midnite. IT was now 1 pm and plans for brewing for a late nite Diner roundtable meeting. Sure enough at 2 pm I had my paws entrenched in the ranch dipping bowl, voraciously sampling the finest poppers in all of the land. Needless to say my 10:30 wake up time today was less than desirable. I got up and rang lori who sounded like pure hell- apparently she had been puking all nite and was still so drunk that I had to drive her car to the doctor's.
I had never experienced nitrous-oxide before. I was told it would feel like I had a few beers. Feeling nauseous from the night before my stomach churned - this coupled with the interrogation that the nurses delivered beforehand into whether I had stuck with my fast the nite before and how if I hadn't I could puke under the anesthesia,
which could go into my lungs and die... The nitrous was pure heaven. It was mellow and completely relaxing. I had the intense desire to chat up the lovely nurse to my left. But I had learned my lesson from the night before. Choose your battles wisely.
Soon the anesthesia took hold and I was experiencing at least a 200 high. You gotta know some good hookups to get this fucked up!

What seemed like 20 minutes later, I was told it was done and I could go. As I sit here awash in painkilling euphoria I'm thinking ahead to the movers at are coming at 7 am to move me to my new apt. Stay tuned for that whole mess :)